thoughts of a dying atheist

slept in my car at around 5am...took the test...i did well on the first 3 questions, but i'm really stressing on the last 2, the first of which I finished but am now doubting the answer, and the second of which I didn't get a chance to finish.

fuck.

in other news, irvine is on fire, along with several other southern california regions, again, sorta like 3-4 years ago. i can really feel the ill effects that the climate has on one's body now after having given up smoking. fire is scary and tragic, but at the same time, it can be a beautiful thing. beyond the imminent loss and damage that it will cause, we can look at the blaze as a means to begin anew.

from the ashes comes hope. either that, or the apocalypse is upon us.

people always say that we can bounce back, but there will be a day where there is no bouncing back, no beginning anew. i am starting to feel that each step that mankind progresses into the future draws us closer to that day when we have exhausted our resources. i have heard that the earth is either very close, or has already exceeded its carrying capacity.

tragic. this is what it means to live at the turn of the century of civilization.